my friend Andrea

Last week I found something in my old Bible -- the one I got when I was ten and that I want to get the inserts from to transfer to my new one. What I found was the program for my friend Andrea's funeral. I saw that she passed away July 22nd, three years ago. Her husband had checked on her when she was asleep, but her spirit was gone. . . . I have memories of her in Young Women with me on Sundays and on Tuesday nights -- a rock climbing activity stands out to me -- and at camps. I think "service" when I think of her; we served each other. She needed a lot of service from her family because she was born with spina bifida and had to use a wheelchair. One way she served was with her great smile.

See? Great smile.

I love the way she kept in touch with everybody after high school. I mean everybody, because it seems that she was friends with all types of people. She called me regularly to chat from about 2004 on. I learned at her funeral that she had about 200 friends that she called probably at least once a month, but I felt special to her. I didn't always know what to talk about when she called, and she sometimes asked me questions that were hard to answer and explain, like about what it was like being pregnant and being a mom (I don't remember specifics). She said that she wanted to know because she wouldn't be able to be a mom. I remember telling her one evening that I was making bean burgers, and she had never heard of bean burgers but didn't say anything negative. She wanted to understand people, I think, and she is an example of how to listen and "love thy neighbor as thyself." She was a sweetheart and so is the man she married.

I also think about the fact that three years before Andrea passed away, her brother did. I attended his funeral to show support to her. I felt the Spirit and love very strongly at both funerals. Her parents are sure going to have a wonderful reunion after many years apart from their kids. (They lost another son, too, and I actually don't know that story but I think he might have been stillborn.)

It was neat that on July 22nd a familiar song came and played in my mind -- a song that Kenneth Cope wrote about a different girl named Andrea. I think my friend Andrea saw beyond the stars, too. I'm looking forward to seeing her run or do cartwheels or whatever she wants when she is resurrected, with a laugh and a smile on her face!

You can hear part of the song here: http://kennethcope.com/albums/stories-from-edens-garden/

ANDREA

(written by Kenneth Cope)

—for Andrea Goodman and family—

Andrea—you wear the smile of paradise

Andrea—you see beyond the stars

Ever reminding me that angels aren’t that far

My Andrea

Andrea—you wear the wings of innocence

It’s like you don’t belong here on the ground

But then there might be some of us who’d never reach the clouds

Without Andrea

And if day turns into gray

If hope hides far away

I know an angel I can go to for a smile

And that haze that has me blind

Will fade from my mind

Just from the thought of you

My Andrea

Andrea—you’re hoping for a better world

You long to be with Jesus in the sky

And I believe you’re going to see what you desire

My Andrea

Andrea—we feared that we had lost you

Gone without a chance to say “Good-bye”

But thanks to God you’ve come back to stay a while

My Andrea

And if day turns into gray

If hope hides far away

I know an angel I can go to for a smile

And that haze that has me blind

Will fade from my mind

Just from the thought of you

My Andrea

When day turns into gray

When hope hides far away

Then I remember how I feel when you are near

And my heart starts to rise

And light fills these eyes

All from the thought of you

From the love of you

My Andrea

Andrea—teach me the smile of paradise

© 1998 Mohrgüd Music (BMI)

a Throwback Thursday collage

I have been doing some pondering today, and I have felt joy. I have been thinking about new friendships, friendship in general, and ways to serve. Those thoughts and those things make me happy. I overheard two smiling mothers as they passed each other outside of First Girl's school: "How are you?" "I don't even know." "Yeah, seriously." For some reason hearing that made me happy, too. I ate garlicky brussels sprouts before eating the rest of my breakfast. I did some laundry (the kitchen still needs some work). I ran two miles in twenty one minutes while our younger daughters played near me in the fitness center. I've been praying more lately and feeling more hope. And the book I'm reading, The Gift of Giving Life, has given me a better "big picture" perspective about life. When I was looking at twitter, where I don't have a photo across the top (I dislike their new look), I thought maybe I would make a collage for that. I love how it turned out but actually decided on something simpler for my twitter page. It was really fun to look at some of our older photos and to be grateful for those memories. So this is a #tbt -- Throwback Thursday. The sheet music in the background is for the song we danced to at our wedding reception in 2004, but I started to learn how to play the piano when I was seven. (I love Jerome Kern and the sweet lyrics, and loved having Roger play the piano!) I still treasure the feeling of being in the Los Angeles temple with my husband in 2006 when I was pregnant; that was a wonderful night. The top middle photo of the collage is from 2008 when I ran a 10k. The bottom left was taken in 2011, and the others are a little more recent. C is here twice simply because the newborn picture reminds me of when each of our children were newborns, and the beauty of each new life. I always wanted to be a mom. The collage represents some of me, my life, and what is special to me.

snowy January + Valentine's Day 2013

I took some winter photos on January 12-13th. We still had our Christmas stuff up (because of my hubby's work hours, basically). The snow and ice can be very beautiful, even if the view of our apartment buildings isn't!

My, what a bright orange coat you have, neighbor!

Looking out from the fitness center.

 

 

P.S. I miss Taylor's family already. He's the boy that Shboogoo was playing with when she was hitting the snow with our yard stick. Weird girl. Oh, and Taylor's mom Lisa, whom I visit taught, drove Shboogoo to and from school each day for two weeks during this colder-than-normal January. My husband was using our minivan as we waited to get our car fixed. Lisa served me more than I served her, and I am very thankful for her. I'm happy that they were able to move close to her husband's new job.

Now for the Valentine-y stuff. I always think about how it was close to Valentine's Day when my friend introduced me to D at a school dance. . . . February 13th was the date that his unit told him he would be deployed (for the first time), but on that day the next year his 2-week leave began. . . . This year, our February 13th lunch included a heart-shaped piece of red bell pepper. That night my hubby and I had our traditional Valentine's Day dinner date, and it was really fun (but no photos). It's always nice to not be interrupted by any of our kids. You don't see him in this post, but I love him so much. He is my best friend. We can hardly remember not knowing each other.

I had pinned instructions for making heart-shaped carrots slices. I didn't end up doing that, but we did make a heart-shaped pizza (a few days later, one of the evenings when their daddy was working). Just a little cheese on the kids' part and nutritional yeast instead on my part. The crust wasn't as good as the rest of it. Maybe I did something wrong because it didn't seem to rise, and I'm pretty sure that after that, I left in the fridge too long before finally baking it. The kids had fun helping, though.

We gave Shboogoo's class fruit leathers for the Valentine's Day party (like we did for Halloween). I didn't take a picture of the finished ones, but I had cut out a heart from leftover scrapbook paper to tape on each one. On the heart I wrote, "I love being in class with you! Love, [Shboogoo]."

I took some pictures of my little Valentines. I can never have too many photos of them. I put C in her heart vest and "I love Grandma" shirt from Nana (the vest came with a different top and pants). Shboogoo had planned on wearing a dark pink shirt that has a big heart on it, and L has a cute magenta and gray outfit with hearts on it. It would've been so cute with all three kids like that (and I was in pink, too), but in the morning on Valentine's Day they decided they really wanted to wear their red owl outfits instead. D worked two jobs that day, so my next-door neighbor took the photos that I was in. 

This is what the kids looked like last year, when C was only about 8 weeks old.

(Here's where I wanted to put the Valentine's Day 2011 photo, but I haven't been able to find it yet. I left this post sitting here for over a week.)

As long as I'm reminiscing, I also like {these} winter photos I took a few years ago. I'm really proud of the one below, which I took on December 20, 2010 -- even though I know very little about cameras. If I want to act like I'm more of an expert, I should say I "shot" it, shouldn't I? :o)

October and November {2012}

:: General Conference ::

Often my husband has not been able to watch it with me because drill weekend often happens the same weekend. It was wonderful that this October's LDS general conference he didn't have drill. During at least one session the girls quietly colored. These and other photos we took this fall are {HERE}.


:: Halloween activities ::

On September 27 my friend Laura L. and I had fun taking our kids to see the witches. I put my baby in a pumpkin and took pictures.


A couple of weeks later I helped the PTA do vision screening, which overlapped with the parent craft activity, but I was able to do both. I painted two little wooden pumpkins, cut and glued on the scrapbook paper, then finished assembling the parts at home.

I also made a wreath for Halloween. I like that it's unique. It's not any of the styles I saw on Pinterest. I tied orange, black, green, and purple fabric scraps around a $1 D.I. wreath and hung it on our front door with clear jewelry elastic (and a piece of packaging tape on the inside of the door). After I had taken it down I accidentally came across the other part I had wanted, so I and added it: silver chipboard letters to spell "BOO." I hot glued these on and decorated the borders of each letter with a black permanent marker.

The most important part of Halloween is the costumes! Like my friend Anne, this year I didn't get the natural light photo I wanted of all of us in our Halloween costumes. I don't know if I ever have; maybe next year. It was just the kids who dressed up this year. They were the three little kittens who lost their mittens. The tails were the challenging part to make; I only made one. I thought that soon after Halloween I'd make two more tails, get the better white clothes (which my husband had moved and I couldn't find them) on the kids, and take a picture outside. Now that it's been so long and there's snow on the ground and I keep forgetting-slash-having-other-things-I-need-to-do, I probably won't.

I thought of the three little kittens idea maybe a couple of months earlier and procrastinated getting the kids' costumes started. I ran out of time to make a costume for me. I was going to be a mama cat, with the mates to their mittens on a string around my neck or something

L is adorable. She always sings the song wrong: "Three little kittens, they lost their mittens and began to cwy and couldn't able to find them."

The kids and I went to our ward party the Friday before Halloween, and it included a trunk-or-treat. On Halloween day Shbogoo gave her class fruit leathers (instead of candy). We watched her school parade at the end of the school day. I let my girls play on the playground before we walked home, and then we headed over to the little party at our leasing office. All five of us spent some time at my mom's; my younger sister and her family came, too. The baby girls are always cute together. I really liked my niece and nephew's costumes. We didn't have our kids go trick-or-treating at all because we had accidentally left the kitten ears at home. For some reason it took us a while to realize this. My mom asked, "So what are their costumes?" It was fine that they didn't trick-or-treat. They had had plenty of candy and even cupcakes at the church, school, and leasing office.


:: Thanksgiving ::

We attended Thanksgiving meals with all of our parents this year. Actually, my husband was going to be able to come to half of them, but since he got sick he missed them all! Both he and the baby were sick Thanksgiving day, so I nursed her before going to Thanksgiving #2 (are you confused yet?), left her home with him, and nursed her right before and right after Thanksgiving #3. The first one (Wednesday night) and the fourth one (Friday at 4:00) he had to work and I of course took all three girls with me. Right now I only have photos of my mom's house and my dad and stepmom's house. The dinner on Wednesday night was the huge one, at my mother-in-law's roommate's parents' house. This was about 60 people, since they've been married a long time and have a lot of posterity. They're so nice to invite us. All four get-togethers were fantastic.


:: Other :: 

Shboogoo turned six and had a nature birthday party. She loves dinosaurs so I made sure to have a drawing of a brachiosaurus be part of the decorations. Probably our favorite part was the "cake": banana bread with a rainbow of top make of pieces of fruit, served with a little vanilla ice cream. Not a lot of friends came, and it was simple, but she kept hugging me and thanking me for making it such a fun party. I took a lot of pictures.

Among other things I don't have pictures of but that happened this October-November: two people I knew on my dad's side of the family (and one person whom I hadn't met) died of sad causes. I didn't know them real well, but I had known my cousin's husband Pete my whole life and I first met the other person -- their grandchildren's mom -- ten years ago. It was good to be able to see relatives at Pete's funeral, and to hear that he, a quiet man, had been living the gospel. That day I felt more grateful for my knowledge of Heavenly Father's plan of happiness for all of his children.

September {2012}

Like the posts I created about June/July and August, this shows only some, not all, of our photos and activities for the month.

For us the most significant event in September was the beginning of our first child's public education. Kindergarten! She enjoyed the testing they did with her in August, and the kindergarten open house, and she was so excited to start. She had to wait longer than a lot of kids, since her birthday is November. Except for falling down and hurting her forehead on the first day of gym, she loves school. She loves to tell me about what they do and which girls are her favorite. We have this conversation while we walk home after her three-hour school day (it's two hours on short day). I've noticed -- maybe it changed as the newness of school wore off -- that she only tells me a few of the things they did. I often have to ask if I want to know. It's been good to make sure I read with her and her sisters for twenty minutes each day. Sadly, we hadn't been spending that much time on books. But I'm impressed by the words she knew how to read even before school began, and I'm impressed by her speed when she does it. My husband had the idea recently to have her read the first verse of our nightly Book of Mormon reading, after she watches one of us read it.

watching the other students

one of her fancy hairstyles for school

I participated in birth junkie stuff two days in a row. First, an Improving Birth National Rally for Change, with took place on Labor Day (get it?). One of my friends who was there was born on Labor Day, too.

 

The purpose of this annual event is to encourage all maternal health care providers to practice evidence-based care. You can click on Improving Birth's web site for more information, and also watch this 3-minute video I got from there. Did you know that in the United States the maternal mortality rate (number of women per 1000 who die of causes related to childbirth) has increased in the last twenty years or so?


Second was an ICAN meeting (two of my ICAN friends had also been at the rally). We decided to include our families this time, not just the ladies. We ended up not talking much about what we usually talk about, but it was fun being at the park and meeting the husbands and kids.

 

my birthday. My sister and I and our kids played in the water at a park. I had invited a few friends but they weren't able to make it. Then my husband and I had a date (no photos): window shopping at a mall and laughing at silly gifts for sale, then eating dinner at Zupa's. He, my little sister, my visiting teacher and another friend in our ward gave me presents, and my parents gave me money.

 

 

 

 

fall leaves. We don't hike often enough, I decided. (I did narrow down the number of photos . . . lots of good ones!)

 

 

 

 

 

 
other September stuff:

 

 

 

 

Our new friend Lisa E. gave us this double stroller. Our kids are in the same school class, but the first words we spoke were when we passed at the entrance to our apartments. She said, "I have a double stroller we're not using. Do you want it?" It's great to have one again because baby C was sometimes sweaty in the carrier during our walk to/from the school. I like this seating better than the side-by-side double stroller we got rid of.

 

It was Family Day at my husband's unit. Since we weren't at a park this time, he actually got to teach the girls about what he does :) He showed us the equipment and trucks, and let the the kids take turns sitting in the driver's seat.